The Return of The Furby

By Anna Brown

The hamster-owl hybrid has made a comeback 14 years later. Yes, the Furby is back. Why Hasbro, why?

According to Toys R’ Us, Sears, Kmart and Target:

The Furby is a must have this holiday season!

The Furby is a domestic robot!

The Furby speaks furbish! (Good thing I speak English).

The Furby is intelligent and can respond to you with words or phrases!

No. The Furby is creepy and wakes you up in the middle of the night because it won’t shut up.

Nice try. (Target, I thought you were better than this).

So what is so exciting about this new and improved Furby? Well, it has LCD eyes for starters. So now instead of just hearing it at night you can see it staring at you too.

Furbies are now outfitted with two brand new abilities: The ability to develop their own personalities and the ability to grow up. Some would call this remarkable, others, apocalyptic.

From the moment you turn your Furby on, everything you do or say to it shapes their personality. As they ‘grow up’ their voices and eyes change, their speaking develops and they become ‘mature.’

I guess the bright side is there is a valley girl personality programmed in some of them.

Here is a quick rundown of all the new, ‘fun’ things you can do with your Furby:

1. Talk to your Furby, they react to your voice.

2. Tilt, shake, or turn your Furby upside down-Usually they will make some surprised sound and their eyes will swivel.

3. Play music-Furby will start grooving.

4. Pet, tickle, or pull-Sensors on the sides and head pick up your touch. You can also pull Furby’s tail, which may result in a mildly vulgar sound (i.e. burps or farts.)

5. Feed by sticking your finger in its mouth.

6. Play on the app.

7. Have Furbies interact with each other.

Reality:

1. If you speak, they will never shut up.

2. If you touch it, they will never shut up.

3. If you play music, it will never stop moving.

4. You don’t need to touch a Furby like that.

5. Keep your fingers to yourself. If the Furby is so ‘real,’ it can find food on its own.

6. Play on the app.

7. Good luck finding someone else with a Furby.

The one thing that remains the same between the old and new Furbies is they cannot actually be turned off. There is no actual ‘on’ and ‘off’ button. It will go to sleep on its own if you leave it alone. I would suggest shutting it away in a closet, but even then… don’t expect to get any sleep.

This wide-eyed, talking, animal robot is currently being sold for a whopping $60.

If Furby’s are coming back from the ‘90s we might as well travel back ten more years and bring back the Cabbage Patch Kids. They are way cuter and won’t talk back.

 

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